What are your boundaries?

Updated: Mar 5, 2020

Have you ever felt walked on or walked over? Have you ever felt afraid to say no to people? Or perhaps you're afraid to hear no from people. Do you feel that if someone says "no" to that they are rejecting you?


If this sounds like you, it may mean you lack strong boundaries. Boundaries are meant to protect you from doing things or having things done to you. Boundaries are not meant to be abusive or intrusive.


So what are some ways in which you can start adding safe boundaries to your life?



1. Ask yourself - If this event, thing that I am being asked to do is something I really want to do?


2. Ask yourself- Is this event, thing something I feel safe in doing?


If you answer "no" to one or both of those questions then say "no" to the person.



Here's the thing to remember (even for yourself) you may be saying "no" to the event or thing, but you are NOT saying "no" to the person. You may want to something else with the person, but not this thing. That's ok.



As a parent, I did not always say "yes" to my children when they asked for something. Sometimes, I had to say no. I loved them enough to say no. I valued them enough to say no.



You need to value yourself to start saying "no".


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